10 Questions I Wish I Wasn't Asked As A Mom of Many
I've been asked a few silly questions as a mom of six kids and a dear friend of mine who has ten kids hears them as well. Most questions are okay, but some questions border on plain obnoxious - especially if you don't know the person well (it can be pretty intrusive). So if you're a mom of many kids, maybe you'll relate to some of the 'I-wish-I-wasn't-asked' mommy questions too! I dedicate this post to the moms who have many kids and many responsibilities. <3
10 Silly Questions a Mom of Many (m.o.m) Gets Asked...
1. Are you pregnant?
I can't believe this question still gets asked! Just know that the m.o.m is either in postpartum and already feels low, or her flat belly is a thing of the past after her fourth child! Her spare time is limited and she'd rather spend it wisely than do excruciating tummy exercises. However it's always one of her goals.
2. Where are you from?
I haven't figured out the true reason for this question yet. Maybe the questioner wants to determine if a m.o.m comes from a distant land where they don't have birth control. Your guess is as good as mine.
3. Are you having more kids?
That's a pretty intimate question and isn't something a m.o.m thinks about until she needs to. I assume (rightly so), that this topic is best left to the husband and wife in question.
4. Are you tired?
Well, the m.o.m actually felt wonderful until you said she looked tired. I guess between the sleepless nights, breastfeeding, diaper changes, cleanups, meal prep, sibling rivalry etc. etc. etc. she should find some time for herself (sigh).
5. Are they all yours?
Compared to...? Sorry I couldn't think of anyone compared to a m.o.m, besides a teacher taking her class on a field trip - and she's usually NOT alone, so that doesn't count either.
6. Don't you have a TV?
Not to sound like a "Debbie-Downer" but nowadays TV is pretty explicit, so I don't think that's a good question anymore.
7. I'm so forgetful/busy/stressed can you please remind me?
Sure! The m.o.m can barely remember all her kids names and birthdays or when she ate last, but she could try with her "mom brain" which usually thinks about these things around 12 am if that works for you.
8. Can you organize it? You're so capable!
Of course! After the m.o.m caters to her large family's needs and the other 101 things she needs to do, she'll find some time to pitch in. What was the reason you weren't capable again?
9. Can my kids come to your place? It's so kid friendly!
True. But the last thing a m.o.m needs is to watch more kids! And yes, watching other people's kids makes a huge difference. A m.o.m usually has more independent kids and her no-frills-less-fussy approach helps cut corners to keep up - so you may not approve of her style.
10. OMG how do you do it?
This isn't a prison sentence - it's motherhood! A path to paradise. A m.o.m would love some help or even a warm hug of comfort, but please no pity is needed here because through all the tough days, she loves her big family!
Mommies of many don't really mind answering your questions, if it's asked in curiosity instead of in judgement. We love our lot of kids and that's why we have so many! A m.o.m just needs a break now and again to refresh and refill her tank and then she's ready to take on her big responsibility all over again! So say something nice the next time you meet a mom of many and avoid these silly questions. She'll love the change and appreciate the gesture. Our beloved Prophet saw said,
“The most beloved of you to me and the closest of you to me on the Day of Resurrection are the best of you in manners.” (al-Tirmidhi)